Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Kentucky Downs No. 11 Tigers 16-4 in Clemson Regional - Clemson Tigers

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Chime Gets a Ringing Endorsement on Wall Street as IPO Valuation Hits $11.6B - PYMNTS.com

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Why does cocaine makes me want to dress up and get fuck

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

James Webb telescope has photographed 3 ultra-massive galaxies, and it changes everything, according to these scientists. - Farmingdale Observer

I actually pay taxes

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Qui omnis et eius rerum et dignissimos vel.

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can read

I have a reading level above third grade

Zika Virus Is Back After 6 Years in One of the Most Popular U.S. Tourist Destinations - AOL.com

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

This map shows what Earth will look like in 250 million years - Notebookcheck

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

There’s a Fascinating Hidden Reason That So Many High-Earning Tech Workers Are Getting Laid Off Now - futurism.com

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Soaring U.S. debt doesn’t just put America at risk. It could trigger contagion across global markets, IIF warns - AOL.com

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Citi Calls Time on Gold’s Rally Due to Slumping Demand, Fed Cuts - Bloomberg.com

I don’t buy bullshit

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Imanaga Rehab, Boyd Shoulder, Reliever Swaps, and Other Cubs Bullets - Bleacher Nation

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I see through liars

I can count

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t cotton to rapists

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

If someone works for me, I actually pay them